Memo 5

I am a middle-class White woman who was born and raised in Rhode Island. As long as I’ve been alive, my parents have been considered middle class. They also have always owned two houses during my lifetime. Growing up, I never had to worry about a lack of shelter, food, clothes, or any other necessities. Therefore, my education was not disrupted. I did attend public school, but I always went to schools that performed well on standardized tests and received adequate funding. I’ve always viewed education as an important and necessary component in my life, which is one reason why I decided to major in the education field.

In regards to my ethnicity, my European descent consists of equal parts Italian, Irish, and English, which I recently discovered through a DNA test. Although my ancestors are from Europe, I am the third generation in my family to be an American citizen, so I know little about these cultures. I do realize that being White in America creates certain privileges, one being that I’ve never had to think much about my race or culture. Even though I am advantaged, I’ve tried to use my point of privilege to spread awareness to others of the disparities within our nation. I grew up with open-minded parents who taught me to advocate for the voiceless within our society. This has helped me develop a strong sense of empathy for others, which I also try to instill within my students. I try to do this in several ways, including journaling, shared writing, multi-cultural texts, lessons on privilege and institutional racism, and learning about authors from diverse backgrounds.

During my own experiences as a student, I found my true role model in high school. I had an inspiring English teacher for three consecutive years. I saw this woman as a mentor and someone that I strived to resemble in my own career. She is the main reason I majored in education, and I often still keep her in mind when I teach today. Due to my experiences within her class, I now often reflect on the important of voice and choice within the classroom. Additionally, I see the important of adding “real-world” relevancy to the lessons we do within the classroom.

 

As an educator, I want to help my students recognize their own capabilities. Until high school, I often felt that I was inadequate when it came to education. These feelings evolved from a combination of grades, peer bullying, and a lack of motivation.  I want to help students realize their own abilities and talents. Additionally, I want to help inform my students about life lessons. I want my students to become contributing members of society who realize the importance of kindness and helping others is more imperative than just becoming wealthy in life. This includes teaching students to think critically and to stand up for their own beliefs.

Regardless of a student’s current grades or situation, I strongly believe that all students want to learn. I think the key is to help students see the relevance in the work they are doing. I try to create this by finding ways for the students to relate to the work. For example, I will often write journal prompts based on a book we are reading but these prompts will ask students to respond personally and to use examples from their own lives. Also, I try to find ways to include articles or technology that relate to the material we are learning while relating to current world affairs. I’ve found that this relevancy is what engaged me in a class, which is why I see it as being a crucial element within my own classroom today.

 

Although I do have these philosophies that I abide by in my career, I do still have some uncertainties and questions within my profession. I have been teaching for three years now, but I still have not been able to get a grip on some questions that I have about education. For example, I wonder what else I should be doing to ensure that I am teaching students to think critically. Am I giving students the space and guidance to think critically or am I spoon feeding them what to think? How can I ensure that students are participating in inquiry?

 

Additionally, I sometimes question if I am reaching each student’s zone of proximal development. Is it possible to adequately challenge all students with the same assignment? I find that I often add modifications for students who might struggle with a text, but is this making it too easy or boring for other students within the room? I find it difficult and time consuming to differentiate instruction or assignments and I wonder if this is something I should be doing more of in my classroom.

Within my own uncertainties, I sometimes experience tensions within my own self-reflection. I’ve had students tell me that they aren’t reading and are only using reading supplements to help them pass my class. There seems to be an overall consensus among students that this is normal and acceptable behavior. I try to assign prompts of questions to accompany the reading and this just leads to more online “answer seeking” or plagiarism. With the growing technology, I find it more and more difficult to hold students responsible. What are other English teachers doing to curve this phenomenon? I’ve talked to recent graduates from local high schools who also admit that they never did the assigned readings and still passed the class. I fear that students are setting themselves up for failure and this is something I hope I can change.

 

            In addition, another area of tension involves the lack of participation I face in some of my classes. Students will sometimes be reluctant to share answers even when called upon. I would like to see more students engage in discussion without me pressuring them into answering. I believe that this is necessary to help students engage with the course and develop their speaking and language skills.

 

In closing, my graduate courses have helped me reflect on my own practice and question how I can improve my praxis. I do believe that teachers can always improve, regardless of their years of experience. This line of thinking has helped closely examine my own instruction and the students’ response. I’m confident my action research project can help me explore these areas of tension, which will make me a better teacher.